Give a hoot ---

Dear Litterbug:

I started writing down your license plate number but was not sure who to call. I thought of following you home just to see if you treat your own house with such utter disdain. I even thought of driving up to your window to yell obscenities, but in this day and age, you never know what that could lead to.

What do I know of you? Obviously, you really love Burger King or you don’t, which is why you decided to whip a large bag of it out your window onto the street . I know you really like your Monster Truck as the gleam of the fresh wash beamed into my eyes as I watched you contaminate the street with your garbage. And you like your vehicle enough to not leave your own trash inside so instead, you leave it to Mother Nature.

Am I taking this out on just you? No. Friday as I drove down Sunset, I watched a person fling Starbucks out of their Mercedes. God forbid you dirty the Mercedes because your latte with the twist had too much foam. The Earth is a much better place to throw your trash…

Not so. I care. And I wish there was a way to make citizens arrests for fucktards that decide that throwing the remnants of their ashtray out the window was somehow a good thing. I wish I could fine people in parks for leaving all of their weekend nosh leftovers to raccoons and the very over-worked and underpaid park workers who have to clean that shit up. Don’t even get me started on the sewers and the fact they drain into our oceans and lakes causing more…ugh, nevermind.

Mostly, I just wish everyone would take a moment to put a bag in their car if they eat or drink in it and dispose of it as nature intended and NOT leave it as the eyesore and contamination it becomes.

Christ people, it’s 2008. There are more than enough warnings that we keep making HUGE mistakes for our environment and all…can you just put your damn garbage in the trash as it belongs? Or compost!